There were no other words to describe the one occasion today that will remain the sole focus of my blog.
It doesn’t refer to one of Erin’s nappies, it has nothing to do with the final scene in the credits of Hangover 3, and has no relevance whatsoever to the large woman at the swimming baths this morning who bent over in a short towel, right next to my face while I was crouched down putting Erin’s shoes on!
It refers to a large spot on Mark’s neck.
Now, I am a bit of a weirdo. I like to pick scabs, squeeze spots, and have a penchant for perusing Mark’s back to find any stray ingrown hairs.
So when he discovered a rather large lump on his neck, which was starting to produce a head, I was rather looking forward to having a good squeeze.
However. This little critter caused me some problems. For days, I’ve been messing with the blasted thing, and it just wouldn’t budge. Until this morning that is.
On close inspection, it looked like Vesuvius, ready to erupt. What happened next, would not have been out of place on one of the Facebook videos entitled ‘Most people can only watch for 20 seconds’.
The first squeeze showed signs of popping, so I got a little closer - big mistake. On the second squeeze, it popped and gunk shot out onto my jumper. On the next squeeze, what can only be described as a tissue’s worth of snot, shot out at 100mph onto..
I don’t even want to say it..
…my forehead. AAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!
I’ve just been informed, there’s still something in there, but I’m not sure I can do it this time. In fact, I’m not sure I’ll ever squeeze a spot again.
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